Time for some more thoughts.
So recently I've been getting some "time to sort out your priorities" signs from God. Some small, some big. I've been kind of unmotivated and definitely unfocused, on anything, really.
It's been hard, cause it's been a lot of letting go or at least putting things really dear to me in God's hands, like relationships.
I kind of love relationships. Of any kind, actually. Human interaction is my favorite. I like to protect them and keep them close to my heart, just right in my pocket. If I misplace them, I look around frantically for them until they're found again and safe, and if they aren't found I'm likely to mourn them, and once the mourning period is over, I will continue to reminisce.
But God likes relationships too, even more than me. In fact, a lot more. And He is so much better at maintaining and perfecting them than I am. No matter how good a friend I try to be or am, He will surpass me. It's through Him that I can even begin to interact in a positive way with others.
So why do I try and hoard my relationships and control them, rather than trusting Him to keep them safe?
So I'm trying to do that. Some days it's great, a lot of days it's hard.
Priorities. I've been doubting and trying to figure out what those are lately. Some days I'm really convinced that I should just hop on a plane back to Honduras, or anywhere. I often feel like I'm wasting time, that if only I could just get moving. And then I have to constantly remind myself that in order to do my best, wherever I'm headed, education won't hinder me. Perfecting my Spanish, learning more about languages and the way humans create and speak them, understanding the Latin culture of Central and South America--all these are going to be foundations for what I have ahead of me.
This past week I was really unmotivated (I had a Spanish exam to prepare for, and I just had no want to even try). and I had a dream last night, all about Honduras. And I don't know why, but it was just a solidification for me of what I'm working towards. It was a major motivation, and I woke up and studied like a beast for my exam. Also, for all wondering, I felt pretty confidant about my exam, but I have no idea what kind of grader my professor is, so we'll see
So I'm moving, upward towards Him, and onward towards my goals and the rest.
So recently I've been getting some "time to sort out your priorities" signs from God. Some small, some big. I've been kind of unmotivated and definitely unfocused, on anything, really.
It's been hard, cause it's been a lot of letting go or at least putting things really dear to me in God's hands, like relationships.
I kind of love relationships. Of any kind, actually. Human interaction is my favorite. I like to protect them and keep them close to my heart, just right in my pocket. If I misplace them, I look around frantically for them until they're found again and safe, and if they aren't found I'm likely to mourn them, and once the mourning period is over, I will continue to reminisce.
But God likes relationships too, even more than me. In fact, a lot more. And He is so much better at maintaining and perfecting them than I am. No matter how good a friend I try to be or am, He will surpass me. It's through Him that I can even begin to interact in a positive way with others.
So why do I try and hoard my relationships and control them, rather than trusting Him to keep them safe?
So I'm trying to do that. Some days it's great, a lot of days it's hard.
Priorities. I've been doubting and trying to figure out what those are lately. Some days I'm really convinced that I should just hop on a plane back to Honduras, or anywhere. I often feel like I'm wasting time, that if only I could just get moving. And then I have to constantly remind myself that in order to do my best, wherever I'm headed, education won't hinder me. Perfecting my Spanish, learning more about languages and the way humans create and speak them, understanding the Latin culture of Central and South America--all these are going to be foundations for what I have ahead of me.
This past week I was really unmotivated (I had a Spanish exam to prepare for, and I just had no want to even try). and I had a dream last night, all about Honduras. And I don't know why, but it was just a solidification for me of what I'm working towards. It was a major motivation, and I woke up and studied like a beast for my exam. Also, for all wondering, I felt pretty confidant about my exam, but I have no idea what kind of grader my professor is, so we'll see
So I'm moving, upward towards Him, and onward towards my goals and the rest.
Just a photo reminder of the kind of awesomeness I'm working toward...:)
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